Moving on

Life is often made up of really nasty and selfish people who thinks they can step over you to save their own interests, and worse still, they don't care what happens to you. If you have gone through life without all these negativity around you, congratulations you lucky one!

But, if you are like the rest of us, and have been once again been betrayed in one way or another by people you could trust... know that you are not alone.

The first thing you will probably feel is the disbelief that cuts right through your heart. Your devastation and anger is well-placed and you are right in all the ways to feel what you feel and think what you think... what is seriously wrong are the people who actually did you the injustice. If they do not feel a sense of guilt, regret over what they have done to you, then well.. seriously they are the people who are totally messed up.

Feel like doing something nasty in return? Well, a bad deed usually deserves another, right? Go on, do it.

Happier? Victorious? Triumphant? Satisfied?

Definitely!

Well, at least for that instant or for the some time to come after that. But, revenge will always come with a backlash... in plotting for all that misery to befall on another, you'll never truly escape being miserable yourself. That's why mean people always end up looking evil and somewhat distorted ugly, cos they live in the ugliness themselves.

So how, you ask? Should I just let them win and get off scot-free? That's too easy on them! How can I heal my hurt and make them pay.

Oh, pay they will. Trust me. But, you actually don't have to do anything to them, and you will be exacting the best revenge. Doesn't make sense? It is all you.

The 100% guaranteed best revenge is to move one, live well and succeed. 

What the?!?  you might go. But hie, who said revenge was ever easy? This is the higher road (literally and figuratively) taken because you know you deserve better. 

Will you exact revenge immediately? No.

Will you be happier immediately? No.

If you are looking for short term satisfaction, by all means, go thrash his face, his car, or whatever you can get your hands on, and create a lot of anger, noise, emotional backlash, financial and legal consequences. Go on then, if you want to pay him back and well, maybe actually pay him. $$$

Life is long, so why settle for the short-term retribution? As the Chinese saying goes.

Vengeance of the Gentleman, Ten Years Not Late 

君子報仇，十年不晚

Will you be satisfied for a longer time? Definitely.

Will you be successful? Definitely.

By literally being successful and rubbing it in his/her face. Muahahaha...

But first, you've to move on. Most people say you've to forgive and forget. But come on, that is like asking you to breath underwater immediately. Can you breath underwater? 

Sure, when you are truly ready to do so; when you've taken enough calming breaths to really do so. Take your time. As much as you need to grief, to come to terms, to let the emotion abate and the rationale to take over. Will it happen? Eventually, but definitely. (Unless you seriously intent to make a misery out of your own life. )

Why should I forgive the selfish bastard/bitch who has betrayed me and doesn't even care?
Because you are doing it for yourself. 

I won't even call it forgiving, but rather putting him/her behind you, away from you because he/she doesn't mean a thing to you anymore. And thank goodness for that well-ridden. Heavens works in amazing ways to help us identify who are the people who holds us dear and whom we should hold dear. Perhaps, without that little mishap, we might never know. Truths can be ugly, but at least you saw past the beautiful lies. 

Make the decision to put it behind you, remind yourself everyday that you are going to forgive the idiot (no other way to call a person who intentionally betrayed anyone). Pray that you will, and finally, one fine day, you'll realise that he no longer means anything.

Meanwhile, while all that praying is ongoing, live well. And I mean... LIVE! Pull yourself strong, let the inner strength in you shine through as you build a life that is better lived, more successful now that you've gotten rid of the scumbag. Why count on another person to be happy? Be happy yourself and you'll find yourself surrounded by more =) because there's no way you can get ahead while you are getting even.

Remember this show?

Remember what the wife did? 

She picked herself up, pulled herself together, became better and finally found herself? She got a job, got friends who stuck by her side, got a man who loved her for who she is. Sometimes that's the best punishment itself for those who hurt us. To let them see that they didn't really hurt us, but helped us to become even better people and succeed in life. 

And what will happen to them? Well, eventually, the husband lost everything -- his job, his reputation, his lover... When he sees how his ex wife was able to rise above everything, he started to lose his own footing and self-confidence. What surprised him was the change in her, not the initial anger with her. And he wanted her back, ... cos she is better now, better than he is... and thus more desirable... as I said... idiot! 

When people do something selfish and mean knowingly, I believe it leaves a mark on them that no magic cleaner can absolve. And by the cyclic nature that the Mother Nature functions in, it will haunt them or come back to them eventually. The best thing is, we don't have to lift a finger to do the dirty work. Best revenge eh?

With that said, I wish that everyone lives a good life without betrayal. But if that is inevitable, know then that in time, you can and will live well without these hoggish idiots in your life! Good riddance!